Sorry.

This post is specially dedicated to a special some one. 

I just want to apologize, sorry for things i've said that hurt you badly. I didn't mean any of them in a bad way, i really don't. Sorry i can't be the one, i truly am sorry. The problem is not you, it's just me. You're great and all, and i'm really fond of you, happy being with you and even sometimes you make me forget about my ex. But, the problem is me.

I really don't want to be your first. Your first should be a better guy, not a playboy. Your first should be the one who's always by your side, not a guy who's even lazy to drive. Your first should be the one that makes you happy, not the one who always hurt you with words. Your first should be a great one, not a fool. You deserve better for a first. At that night, when i asked you to simply go couple with a guy then only come back to me, i was really just joking. I really didn't mean to hurt you. What i really meant was just to tell you to go find a better guy, not me.

Another thing is i'm not ready yet. Yes, sometimes you do make me forget about my ex but my memories of me and her just keep coming back, randomly. It's just isn't fair when i'm still in love with my ex and you're there left hanging. That's why i chose to tell make things clear. I don't want you to waste your time waiting for me or anything. You can find a better person, i'm sure there are many better guys out there waiting for you.

I'm really sorry, sincerely. I'm sorry if you felt that i played your feelings. I'm sorry for everything. I just wished that we can be like last time, just close friends. Going out on dates together and all. Nothing complicated. Maybe now is just not the right time yet. I don't know what else to tell you besides apologizing. I really do feel bad. I'm sorry, truly from my heart.

Sorry.